FAMILY FEASTINGS: The Latest Halloween Horror From Mouthing Off

FAMILY FEASTINGS: The Latest Halloween Horror From Mouthing Off

‘Family Feastings’ is a horror poem from Sam Barrowcliffe, illustrated by Liam Callebout. It’s the second instalment in our Halloween mini-series: Five Nights of Horror.


The Barons and McMannons were the best of friends

The did everything together… ’till their lives turned the bend!

It all happened one sunny afternoon in July

With the sun, a clear blue, and birds in the sky;

But, as their wise old grandparents would say

We must all buy our meal tickets and pay up, someday!

Alas, both families set out – completely unprepared

For the heinous horrors they were destined to share.

On that freak day of sun, they looked forward to fun!

Little could they have foreseen of this miserable run…

As the wives and the daughters had stayed home to knit

And the husbands and sons had found baseballs to hit,

It came in the form of a solar eclipse

And by God, did it wipe the smiles from their lips.

The children saw it first, fingers pointed up high

“Mummy, Daddy look, the sun’s gone – no lie!”

But the parents noticed the blackness, oh yes sir they had

And from somewhere in their heads, a speck of madness grew bad.

You see, something in that darkeness changed them for the worst;

It gave the Mummies and Daddies the most terrible blood-thirst.

And who better to kill for a taste of human flesh

Than their own children – ha!

Well, couldn’t you guess?

Down in the field all ball batting had stopped

For the once healthy sons were attacked on the spot;

Turned venomous, the Daddies swung wildly on sight

And completely and utterly punched out their lights!

Meanwhile, still dark, way back at the house

The Mummies, too, were hungry for a taste of young blouse

And though quickly to the door their young girls did dart –

They were caught, knitting needles driven straight through their hearts.

And there, the parents of the dead did feast on their young

Gobbling up eyes, lungs, stomachs and tongues!

So now we reach our spectacular show-stopper:

As the darkness that made their brains come a cropper

Vanished in seconds, when the sun came back

To restore all the sanity they’d suddenly lacked.

Then the parents looked, in shock, on their young

With their gobbled-up eyes, lungs, stomachs and tongues

And though they gasped and they wept, their tears falling in showers

Nothing they could do would bring back their dear flowers.

And so we reach the end of the Barons and McMannons,

As the parents blew their brains out with rusty hand-cannons!

And when the Mummies and Daddies lay down there, all dead,

The house and the field turned a thick shade of red.

So hear me now when I say:

If you’re ever out walking on a fine summer’s day

And see a shadow ‘cross the sun

You better turn around right there, high tail it and run!


This poem is the SECOND instalment in our Five Nights of Horror series, bringing you tales to make you shit yourself right up to Halloween. We’ll see you tomorrow…

About The Author

Sam Barrowcliffe

I am nineteen years old and will begin studying English Literature and Creative Writing at the University of Warwick in September. Since starting at Mouthing Off as Creative Writing Editor, I have written and published a number of short stories and can’t wait to share even more. My favourite genres are horror and science – fiction and I take great inspiration from the likes of Rod Serling, Charlie Kauffman, H.P Lovecraft, Christopher Nolan and Phillip K. Dick. In the future, I hope to follow my dream of becoming a professional screenwriter and novelist, following in the footsteps of my idols. I look forward to publishing even more fiendish tales and I hope people will continue to enjoy reading them, as much as I have writing them!

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